Friday, April 15, 2011

It's Lovely to Have Sisters

Been so busy and it's been so long.  Wanted to check in, though.

A)  My depression has gotten WAY better since I finally got in to see a new psychiatrist (a month wait list for new patients).  I'm so thankful, as the last 2 years have been really really tough for me.  Not that everyone else doesn't have their problems, too.  We've all got some.  I'm just so grateful for some relief so I can be more like ME again.

B)  My older sister, Carla, finally moved here from Oregon!  I say, "FINALLY", because I've been working on her for literally years to try to get her to move here.  Of my 6 siblings, she was the only one that was fairly inaccessible to me.  I think she quite liked it that way, to be honest.  (Can't say as how I blamed her for moving back then when she did--crazy people in the family can make wanting to "stay close" less-appealing.)  But, now we're all older and I'm glad she's close.  I love both my sisters (1 older, Carla, and 1 younger, Casey) so much.  Even though I was the "middle child" both in the family and in between sisters, and I was a rotten, mean, bossy child, I've gotten somewhat better.  I'm glad my sisters and I are so close.  No one can make me laugh the silliest laughs like they do.  It's a special wacky kind of humor that only a certain amount of history and genetic resemblance can induce.

However, that being said, I also feel so blessed that I have so many, many wonderful girlfriends in my life.  You know that saying that goes something like, "When one door closes, another one will open"?  Life really is kind of like that.  I had a VERY rough time of it in 5th and 6th grade.  The girls in my class were so mean and catty.  If you remember being that age, or have female children who've been that age, undoubtedly you'll recall the ridiculosity (cool word I just invented) of those "friendships".  For me, as I was really smart, my "girlfriends" would always ask me for the answers to the homework they failed to complete.  I used to give it to them because I sooooo wanted to "fit in".  But somewhere around age 11 or 12, I not only began to grow boobs, but a sense of self, as well.  When I began turning them down for their requests, they HATED me.  Not only did they ignore me and make fun of me, one girl even SPAT on me walking home from school one day!  Can you believe that?!  By the time I moved on to Jr. High School (7th grade), I was determined that I would NEVER let myself be hurt by "friends" like that again.

At first, I was a little wary of making "friends" all over again.  I kind of figured all girls were like that.  But, as I focused more on being the ME I wanted to be and less on what I thought others wanted me to be, I found some really great people who liked me just as I was.  I was funny, charismatic, smart and interesting (I don't know what's happened since....but that's another story. :)  From that point forward, I became increasingly skilled at making friends.  Don't get me wrong, it wasn't just like I decided it would be so and viola, it was.  No, no, no.  As with anything worthwhile, it has taken YEARS and YEARS of practice.  Occassionally I still get "burned" by not so good people, but it hurts a lot less because I know I will always find other/better friends.  They're the ones who are missing out!

So back to the point at hand, I am so grateful for wonderful genetic sisters, as well as my "sisters" that are my close friends.  Some I've had for decades, while others have been with me for just a few short months.  All are treasured in my heart (as cheesy as that sounds).  They love me for me and that is one of the best feelings in the world, wouldn't you agree?  As the last 2 years have been a daily depression battle, I've often said prayers of gratitude to a Heavenly Father who loves me enough to bless with me with amazing, talented, caring friends who help get me through the rough patches.  Just knowing there was someone who I could go to lunch with, or share a craft with, or even exchange emails (detailing the many gorgeous items we've found on the internet that we would "buy" for each other), always gave me hope and something to look forward to.

The past few weeks have been especially full of love and friendship.  I hope the rest of the year continues to be as bright and warm as this Spring is proving to be.

Though this is probably the WRONG thing to do (inevitably I'll forget someone and hurt her feelings), I'd still like to give a shout out to some of my favorite girlfriends.  We may not talk often, or we may see each other every day.  No matter what, though, these are those that mean a lot to me at this point in my life (just as others have played important roles at different periods of my life).  I thank you all for your loving kindness, constancy  and loyalty in our relationships:

Carla--my older sister
Casey--my younger sister
Mom--my really older sister :)
Dee Dee--my BFF for life--who makes me laugh just as hard as my sisters.
Rebecca--my HS BF who builds me up better than anyone.
Alisa--who's opened up my world to the past and my future to creativity.
Nina--who understands my heart better than most because she KNOWS.
Julie--for sending that first email and being so open and honest.
Lori--my kindred spirit in all things crafty, decor, food, etc.
Jenn O.--we clicked from day one and I so love our discussions.
Kirsten--the model of perfect mothering and food storage reliance!

I'm sure I've missed a few, and if you are someone I missed--please forgive me.  I'm a crazy old bat with a poor memory!

Love to all!

p.s. Today my sister, Carla, and I did a "photo-shoot".  How fun is that?  Sisters are the few who will actually tell you when you look fat in a picture and to re-pose.  Her pictures turned out great, I think.