It's Lovely to Have Sisters

Been so busy and it's been so long.  Wanted to check in, though.

A)  My depression has gotten WAY better since I finally got in to see a new psychiatrist (a month wait list for new patients).  I'm so thankful, as the last 2 years have been really really tough for me.  Not that everyone else doesn't have their problems, too.  We've all got some.  I'm just so grateful for some relief so I can be more like ME again.

B)  My older sister, Carla, finally moved here from Oregon!  I say, "FINALLY", because I've been working on her for literally years to try to get her to move here.  Of my 6 siblings, she was the only one that was fairly inaccessible to me.  I think she quite liked it that way, to be honest.  (Can't say as how I blamed her for moving back then when she did--crazy people in the family can make wanting to "stay close" less-appealing.)  But, now we're all older and I'm glad she's close.  I love both my sisters (1 older, Carla, and 1 younger, Casey) so much.  Even though I was the "middle child" both in the family and in between sisters, and I was a rotten, mean, bossy child, I've gotten somewhat better.  I'm glad my sisters and I are so close.  No one can make me laugh the silliest laughs like they do.  It's a special wacky kind of humor that only a certain amount of history and genetic resemblance can induce.

However, that being said, I also feel so blessed that I have so many, many wonderful girlfriends in my life.  You know that saying that goes something like, "When one door closes, another one will open"?  Life really is kind of like that.  I had a VERY rough time of it in 5th and 6th grade.  The girls in my class were so mean and catty.  If you remember being that age, or have female children who've been that age, undoubtedly you'll recall the ridiculosity (cool word I just invented) of those "friendships".  For me, as I was really smart, my "girlfriends" would always ask me for the answers to the homework they failed to complete.  I used to give it to them because I sooooo wanted to "fit in".  But somewhere around age 11 or 12, I not only began to grow boobs, but a sense of self, as well.  When I began turning them down for their requests, they HATED me.  Not only did they ignore me and make fun of me, one girl even SPAT on me walking home from school one day!  Can you believe that?!  By the time I moved on to Jr. High School (7th grade), I was determined that I would NEVER let myself be hurt by "friends" like that again.

At first, I was a little wary of making "friends" all over again.  I kind of figured all girls were like that.  But, as I focused more on being the ME I wanted to be and less on what I thought others wanted me to be, I found some really great people who liked me just as I was.  I was funny, charismatic, smart and interesting (I don't know what's happened since....but that's another story. :)  From that point forward, I became increasingly skilled at making friends.  Don't get me wrong, it wasn't just like I decided it would be so and viola, it was.  No, no, no.  As with anything worthwhile, it has taken YEARS and YEARS of practice.  Occassionally I still get "burned" by not so good people, but it hurts a lot less because I know I will always find other/better friends.  They're the ones who are missing out!

So back to the point at hand, I am so grateful for wonderful genetic sisters, as well as my "sisters" that are my close friends.  Some I've had for decades, while others have been with me for just a few short months.  All are treasured in my heart (as cheesy as that sounds).  They love me for me and that is one of the best feelings in the world, wouldn't you agree?  As the last 2 years have been a daily depression battle, I've often said prayers of gratitude to a Heavenly Father who loves me enough to bless with me with amazing, talented, caring friends who help get me through the rough patches.  Just knowing there was someone who I could go to lunch with, or share a craft with, or even exchange emails (detailing the many gorgeous items we've found on the internet that we would "buy" for each other), always gave me hope and something to look forward to.

The past few weeks have been especially full of love and friendship.  I hope the rest of the year continues to be as bright and warm as this Spring is proving to be.

Though this is probably the WRONG thing to do (inevitably I'll forget someone and hurt her feelings), I'd still like to give a shout out to some of my favorite girlfriends.  We may not talk often, or we may see each other every day.  No matter what, though, these are those that mean a lot to me at this point in my life (just as others have played important roles at different periods of my life).  I thank you all for your loving kindness, constancy  and loyalty in our relationships:

Carla--my older sister
Casey--my younger sister
Mom--my really older sister :)
Dee Dee--my BFF for life--who makes me laugh just as hard as my sisters.
Rebecca--my HS BF who builds me up better than anyone.
Alisa--who's opened up my world to the past and my future to creativity.
Nina--who understands my heart better than most because she KNOWS.
Julie--for sending that first email and being so open and honest.
Lori--my kindred spirit in all things crafty, decor, food, etc.
Jenn O.--we clicked from day one and I so love our discussions.
Kirsten--the model of perfect mothering and food storage reliance!

I'm sure I've missed a few, and if you are someone I missed--please forgive me.  I'm a crazy old bat with a poor memory!

Love to all!

p.s. Today my sister, Carla, and I did a "photo-shoot".  How fun is that?  Sisters are the few who will actually tell you when you look fat in a picture and to re-pose.  Her pictures turned out great, I think.

Coin Wrapper Tag Swap

I haven't had anything particular to blog about lately. I am excited for spring, though.  Spring always makes me happier.  Too bad it's too short-lived here in TX before we go right into the 90s!  Oh well, I'd rather be hot than cold.  I'm usually cold in the summertime, though, because by dear sweet husband thinks it's appropriate to keep the A/C turned down to 66.  Ridiculous, I KNOW!  But, I can't put layers on...

Not having much interesting going on right now, I thought it'd be nice if I shared one of the past swaps I participated in with two of my closest friends.  We did a "coin wrapper" tag swap.  We each used Quarter coin wrappers as the base of our tag.  We decided on a theme of favorite quotes.  We each did 3, and then Alisa kindly put them together in a sort of mini-book format.  She even added lettered circle tags at the bottom to spell out "Wise Words".  Isn't she clever?!

This is the cool cover tag she made.  I'm totally diggin' the old rusty key!

"You Reap What You Sow"

This one is SO cool because you unwrap it!  How neat-o is that for a coin "wrapper"?

One of us has a big ol' "girl crush" on Rebecca Sower.  I'll not mention any names....yet.

This treasure has a really cool coating of beeswax on top of the tattered muslin and the hand-colored angel.  I also love the calming wisdom in these words.  That's straight from the Source.

"A Large Wife and a Large Farm Never Did a Man Any Harm."

Those are tea-stained cupcake liners there.  You can't see it very well here, 

but they also have tiny little pink flowers on them.

"Don't Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch."

Now, can you guess who created which ones?  

2011 Desktop Calendars

As promised, here are the links to your 2011 Desktop Calendar Backgrounds.  At the end of this post are some help/instructions for setting each picture as your background (in case anyone needs a hint).

February 2011
Resolution Size 1280x1024
Resolution Size 1152x864
Resolution Size 1024x768

March 2011
Resolution Size 1280x1024

Resolution Size 1152x864

Resolution Size 1024x768

April 2011

Resolution Size 1280x1024

Resolution Size 1152x864

Resolution Size 1024x768

May 2011

Resolution Size 1280x1024

Resolution Size 1152x864

Resolution Size 1024x768

So far, May is my favorite.  I'll get the rest of the 2011 months to you soon!



INSTRUCTIONS / HINTS for SETTING BACKGROUND IMAGE:

These are the first five months of 2011 Desktop Calendars I made.  Now, they're not perfect or anything, but I personally, prefer to have a desktop background that has a calendar on it.  Makes my life sooooo much easier!  So I put these together for you.  (Sorry February is already halfway over!)

THE FOLLOWING IS ABOUT HOW TO CHECK/CHANGE YOUR SCREEN RESOLUTION.  IF YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW TO DO THIS, SKIP TO THE IMAGE LINKS BELOW.

If you don't know how to save an item as your desktop background, just select an image and right click on it. It should give you the option to save as wallpaper/background.   Also, you may need to be aware of your screen resolution.  I know, I know, "Cheryl, don't give me a bunch of that techy talk.  I don't got time for that!  You're lucky that I'm even on here reading your blog entry."  But, for those who might not know, but would like to, you can check your screen resolution by doing the following:

• Click the START button at the bottom left of your screen
• Select CONTROL PANEL
• Select DISPLAY
• Click on the SETTINGS tab
• You will then see a little left to right slider bar in the middle.  Notice where your pointer is on that bar.  Is it far to the right, the middle, far to the left?  Remember.  
• Try sliding the bar back and forth left and right a little bit slowly.  You may notice your screen change.  If you slide it all the way to the right.  You will select 1280x1024 (pixels) resolution.  That's what I prefer to use because it means I can see the most stuff possible at a time on my computer screen.  It also makes things more crisp for viewing, though smaller (which you can also change the size of your screen text if you desire, but that is another topic--email me if you need help).  If you slide your bar to the left, there are 3 other "notches" of resolution you can choose:  1152x864, 1024x768, and 800x600.  Most people use the "standard" 1024x768 resolution.  But, you can decide whichever one you prefer.  If you increase your resolution, you'll see a whole new world on some of your web pages.  For example, most people have a "background" pattern on their blog.  If you go to someone's blog, you may see very little of this "background" on the left and right sides of your screen.  However, if you increase your screen resolution to 1280x1024 you will likely see a LOT more of this background pattern.  Play around with the resolution, visit other webpages and see what you prefer.  Or, keep it right where you have it if you wish.
• Choose your resolution size and click APPLY
• After your screen is altered, click OK
• Close everything up

Now you are ready to go grab one of my desktop background images and save it as your background/wallpaper.  I made the images in 3 resolution sizes (1280x1024, 1152x864, and 1024x768) so it would work for you with whichever screen resolution you've chosen.  (Except for the lowest resolution because no one really uses that one.)  Be sure to select the image with the same resolution you selected in the DISPLAY SETTINGS.  If you don't, it will still work, but it won't fit your screen just right.

• After you’ve determined which picture you are going to download as  your background, click the link and go to the image.  When you see the image at Image Shack.com, right click it.  Select “Save Image As”.  Save the image somewhere on your computer (desktop?) where you will know where to go back to get it.  If you’re forgetful (like me), you may even want to write down which folder you filed it in!
• Once you have saved the image to your computer, go back to where you saved it.  Open it.  Right click on the image.  Select “Set as Background”.  Viola!  There you have it! 

Valentine's Day Desktop Calendars For You!

The last couple of weeks have not been my favorite 2 weeks of my life.  I can think of many other 2 week spans that were way more fun than the last two.  My vacation to Disneyworld; High School Graduation; Wedding and Honeymoon.  Got the stupid cold that's been goin' around.  It's just an annoying cough that makes my abdomen workout--and she doesn't want to.

But, today is Valentine's Day!  Yippee.  I love any sort of Holiday there is to celebrate and share fun and/or love.  I especially love holidays that include receiving gifts (what woman doesn't?)  I am excited to go on a date with my wonderful husband.  He's getting better every year at Valentine's Day, My Birthday, and Anniversary.  I've pretty much kept telling him things he can do and warn him not to make past mistakes because the rule in our house is "If Momma Ain't Happy, Ain't Nobody Happy."  He tells this to the dogs all the time because if I'm mad at him, he feels he can pass the blame on down the line.  So, in order to help him not make past mistakes, like I said, I keep giving him reminders and hints.  I also keep an updated wishlist on Amazon.com so there is no "I didn't know what to get you" excuses.

And just as an aside (my personal opinion), I feel that those people who say stuff like, "I think Valentine's Day is a manufactured holiday just so the companies can sell a bunch of crap at an inflated price so women won't get mad", are a bunch miserable souls.  They say, "I don't need a manufactured holiday to give my baby flowers or candy and tell her I love her.  I can do that any day of the year."  However, it has seemed to me in the past that those who proffer such wisdom, are rarely the ones who abide by it.  They're all talk and no action.  Wouldn't you agree?

And another random thought, I DO however feel for the single or lonely on Valentine's Day who WISH they had a Valentine of their own to shower affection and gifts upon.  Their lack of enjoyment of Valentine's Day is more acceptable than the previous type of pessimists as noted above.  You're either Stingy-Hearted (yes, that is a real word--a cheryl word anyway) or your not.  The question is not whether you have a Valentine to love, but rather that IF you had a Valentine, how would you love?  I was single on pretty much every Valentines Day of my life up until I met Lloyd (had a couple of good ones with my ex-fiance, although for some strange reason he thought it appropriate to get me "Happy Secretaries Day" orange balloons to go with the roses he brought.  It still makes me laugh when I remember.  I longed for a Valentine, but just didn't have one.  I did however, send Valentines to other people (friends and family) that I love.  I don't care if it's a day marked on the calendar that reminds you to let the ones you love know how much you care for them.  Is it ever a bad day to do that?

Oh, but I've strayed.  How very unlike me.  (yes, sarcasm implied).  Back to the Amazon Wishlist.  Did you know that you can add things to your Amazon Wishlist that aren't necessarily sold by Amazon?  Yeah, it's great.  I've been doing it for a couple of years now.  It's called a Universal Wishlist and you can get it by clicking here.  You have to have already set up a regular Amazon Wishlist (it's free), but once you have, you can add the Universal Wishlist Button to your browser menu.  Next time you're enjoying your shopping on Etsy.com, you can save an item to your Amazon Wishlist by clicking on the Universal Wishlist Button.  Viola! It adds it to your wishlist account.  I love modern technology!

So I'm so excited because my honey is coming home soon and he's already planned (made reservations even) for a date!  Wow!  He is getting so good at this.  I wasn't even supposed to be writing such a long blog post because I need to get my "outside face" on.  But, in all my zest for Valentine's Day, I thought of giving you, my reader, something as a token of my appreciation for following me and commenting to me, and sharing with me.

Okay, so without further adieu, I love you blogland peeps, family, friends.  I appreciate your support.  Happy Valentine's Day!  (See next separate post for my small gift to you.)

I Live and Love With My Whole Heart -- And It's Okay!

I had a great conversation with my husband, Lloyd, this evening.  Lloyd is one of the most loving and generous men I've ever known.  I'm so thankful to be married to him and love him deeply.  I feel like he's my greatest blessing from a Heavenly Father who loves me.  That being said, it doesn't mean that we never struggle. Face it, if you're married to a man, there WILL be struggles at times.  No sexism intended.  Well, okay, maybe just a little...  Men and women, as we all know, are just "wired" differently.  In general, men are not the "communicators" that women seem inherently born to be.

Sometimes I get frustrated with Lloyd because he keeps a lot inside.  A third of that is that he's an introvert by nature.  Another 33% of it is that he is an only child and the majority of his "conversations" in life are between the characters in the books he reads.  The remaining half is that he's just a man--a man who believes it is his sacred duty to "protect" his wife from all hardship and pain.  So, inevitably, he doesn't communicate to me the way I would like him to and that results in frustration and my feelings getting hurt at times.  Now, if you know me at all, you know I'm a sensitive soul.  It isn't necessarily the hardest thing in the world to wound me emotionally.  I own that.  (Don't, however, label me as "moody" because I view that as a negative word tactless people throw out to absolve themselves of wrongdoing rather than seeking forgiveness for their lack of sensitivity.)  However, the good thing about me is that I am a communicator.  If my feelings are injured, and I care enough about the other person to even bother, I will tell him what I'm feeling and we can talk things out.  Another good thing about me is that I'm very empathetic and I don't hold grudges very well.  Once I start talking with said person, I usually come to understand why he said X thing and my empathy kicks in until I'm no longer hurt.  I now UNDERSTAND and that's usually all it takes (although, admittedly, a sincere apology always helps speed the enlightenment and healing.)

Over the last couple of days Lloyd and I have had a few "misunderstandings".  A large part of it is probably due to my having cabin fever (couped up inside due to icy roads and poor weather conditions).  Another part is likely a result of the pressure of his job right now.  Tonight came the proverbial "straw that broke the camel's back" , but thankfully we were able to take some time to sit down and talk things out.

I'm so blessed to have a husband who cares about communication.  Lloyd was married before.  He explains that he and his former wife had very poor communication and that was part of their marital problems.  He vowed that if he ever fell in love again, before deciding to remarry, he would be sure that the object of his affection would be a good communicator.  He knew he wasn't inherently the best at communicating, but recognized the importance of it in relationships, especially marriage.  During our whirlwind courtship (we met and were married within the course of 8 months--and would've married sooner had it been possible), situations arose that were challenging.  He said he knew he loved me the first time one such situation arose and we worked through it together honestly and openly.  We're on our 7th year of marriage now and we still try to always maintain that standard in resolving conflicts or other challenges.  We're not perfect, but we try.

I intermittently follow a psychologist online, Dr. Brene Brown, PhD.  I have a couple of her books and the things she talks about really make sense to me.  The quote of the week on her blog is by C.S. Lewis and couldn't be more applicable to what I am feeling this weekend in my relationship with my husband.  It is equally valuable for me to remember in all of life's relationships.

I grew up in a family where I felt that being openly loving, vulnerable, and honest were wrong.  When I was being myself, inevitably, it caused problems.  Ergo, throughout the course of my adult life, I've tried unsuccessfully over and over to close my heart so it wouldn't get hurt. But, because of who I was born to be, I've yet to be fully able to accomplish the task.

Morgan Weistling - The Promise

Now, I'm trying to learn that for me, success is about being vulnerable--about loving fully and freely, in spite of the pain that inevitably accompanies such love.  It hurts so much at times and I cry bigger crocodile tears than anyone I know.  But, I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that this is a good thing.  It's good to be who I am.  Being "sensitive" is ok.  It's better than ok.  Being sensitive and vulnerable, in my mind anyway, means that I'm attempting to be more Christlike.  We know from The Bible that Christ was perfect in his love for others (John 15:3).  We also know from the book of Isaiah, that he has felt our pain and borne our sorrows (Isaiah 53:4).   If we are to emulate Christ and live his example, then shouldn't we, too, be willing to open our hearts, even if it means that at times we will experience pain by so doing?  I think it does.

Hand in Hand - Greg Olsen

When feelings are hurt or I feel alone or unloved, I'm going to try to remember that this is okay.  It's part of being a loving and vulnerable being--even part of trying to follow the Savior's example.  I shouldn't fear the pain that inexorably will at times accompany being a loving and vulnerable person.  Perfect love casteth out fear (1 John 4:18).  If I continue to try to live openly with my whole heart , then my fear of being hurt should diminish.  Sadness and sorrow should turn to joy.  Who wants their heart in a casket anyway?